Moms Talk: Collections

My friend Ryan's guitar collection could equip every garage band in Capitola. It is a popular subject of his wife’s chiding. He has more guitars than fingers. They have a rule in their house that all of his guitars must fit into one closet. It’s a tight squeeze. 

Collecting seems like a harmless part of human nature, but it can be taken too far—just watch a few minutes of ghastly reality shows like Hoarders. Stamps, coins, teacups, spoons and baseball cards are common and traditional items for collecting. But collections of weird and grand proportions—vintage handcuffs, PEZ dispensers and navel fuzz, for starters—hide in the homes of even the most unsuspected characters. 

My son, who is 9, has been collecting things since he could start grabbing them with gooey fingers. He especially loves miniature items. “Mom, it’s just so cute!” he exclaims with a scrunched face, as he picks up a tiny penguin eraser.

Silly bands, marbles, miniature erasers, what's next?

Admittedly, I have a collecting habit of my own. Art supplies, pens and books are hard for me to pass on or part with. While having an overabundance of possessions can make life into a constant game of treasure hunting for misplaced objects, letting go of unneeded treasures can invoke feelings of anxiety, fear or sadness.

Managing a collecting habit can be challenging. Minimizing additions and limiting purchases can help to keep the collecting under control. Is it useful? Does it have value? These are questions I ask myself and teach my son to ask as he palms a new little gem, longing to add it to his collection.

Several years ago, when Kai was just starting school, we took up beach-combing together. We would compare our finds and later place them in the garden or inside a houseplant. Collecting rocks and sea glass has become an affordable hobby we can share. Now, after a storm, we check the charts for a low tide so we can add to our collection.

A few times a year, when I backpack and Kai stays home with his dad, I bring a rock from my journey. It’s a free souvenir, usually heart-shaped. My obsession started with a piece of warped sea glass that looks like a heart. It’s a sweet little collection that reminds me of places I’ve been and reminds Kai that I think of him when I’m away.

We went rock hounding—searching for particular kinds of rock in a geographic region known for it—during our road trip through Utah last summer. Amid a field of agate, we saw a bright-green lizard scurry away on red dirt into the heat. We learned that agate is too hard for rock hammering, and found a crystallized chunk of rock that makes a great doorstop.

Collecting can be fun and educational, if we are sensible about it and make the right judgment calls on what has value.